Is
Sex the Glue to a Relationship?
By Ed Rigsbee, CSP
(423 words)
This question gets
asked quite frequently; is sex the glue to a relationship? If you are
20 and are experiencing raging hormones, you would most likely answer;
absolutely! However, if you are 60 your answer might be something
like; sure it is important but not the kind of glue that holds
relationships together for the long-term. While age should not be a
determiner of sexual activity, it is of priority.
Sex
and Glue Tact-ability
Glues have varying
adhesion factors. I like to use Gorilla Glue for my wood working
projects because it is both water proof and holds forever. However the
glue that 3M uses on their Post-it Notes is very different as it has a
very low adhesive factor. If sex is like relationship glue, then which
glue is it—the stuff that sticks forever or that lets go at the
slightest tug? Never in construction does an architect, engineer, or
master builder rely on glue for structural integrity so why would you?
Sex
as the Mitigating Factor
Sex is easily an age
appropriate relationship glue; more on the onset and less in the
long-haul. If you are younger the more important question is one of
relationship tenure. If you are enjoying a “fun” relationship and
you have no expectations of the relationship’s long-term viability,
then yes—sex is glue. And, if you are looking for a long-term
relationship, sex is also an important mitigating factor. While the
relationship will most likely fail in the long-term without sex, you
must realize that sex will not bind a misfit, structurally unsound,
relationship forever. Sex as “glue” will only last so long. Sex is
a binder not a support mechanism.
Relationship
Gorilla Glue
The true glue that
binds any long-term relationship is trust, courtesy, and
mutual-respect—aka, love. Without these elements, even the most
outrageous porn-star quality sex will only take you so far. The
novelty will wear off. Conversely, good healthy loving relationships
do enjoy sex as one of the foundational success building blocks.
What’s
a Horn Dog to Do?
If sex is your
obsession and you want it to be your relationship glue, all I can say
is; good luck. But, is sex is one of many important elements within
your relationship; I’ll say that you are lucky. Let trust, courtesy,
and mutual-respect do the relationship heavy lifting and sex be the
value added element that keeps things interesting. My final vote on
sex as the relationship glue: not really, well kind of, oh gosh, it is
up to you.
Happy loving…
Copyright 2010 Ed
Rigsbee
# # #
Ed Rigsbee, CSP, for over two
decades, as the speaker on relationships has been helping business individuals and organizations of
all sizes to grow their market through smart alliance
relationships--while at the same time helping individuals to develop
what he calls Relationship Glue for their personal lives. He
is also the author of PartnerShift-How to Profit from the
Partnering Trend and The Art of Partnering. Rigsbee has
over 1,500 hard-copy published articles to his credit and is a
regular keynote presenter at corporate and trade association
conferences teaching North America how to access their Collaborative
Advantage through the steps he shares in his writing and
lectures. You can access all Ed's Web Sites and Blogs through www.rigsbee.com.
|
